All about pre-nups

You've named the date, bought the dress and ordered the flowers. Could the last thing on your 'to do' list before you say 'I do' be a pre-nuptial agreement?

It is not just the rich and famous who want to protect their pockets in the event of a break-up. Half of the mere mortals questioned in a survey by internet bank smile confess that they would take out a pre-nup before walking down the aisle. You may think that romance is dead but just ask any friend or relative who has been through an acrimonious divorce and you will discover that when the going gets tough, some partners are prepared to get whatever they can.

Put simply, a pre-nuptial agreement is a formal document entered into by the future husband and wife which sets out how they want to deal with their finances if the marriage ends. It may ring-fence a certain amount of money, possessions or property which one or other party brings to the relationship and expects to be left untouched by the other if the marriage fails. It could set out details of how joint property or assets will be split and the size of any financial settlement to be awarded to either partner. By its very nature, the document is personal and can be made as detailed as the couple would like.

Paper thin

The real issue about pre-nups in the UK is whether they are worth the paper they are written on. Historically, courts in England and Wales have operated on the principle that marriage is for life and so would not recognise a document which undermined this concept. In recent years, however, the English courts have started to pay more attention to professionally drawn-up agreements where it is clear that income and capital has been openly disclosed by both parties and no one has been forced to sign the document. Consequently, lawyers advise their clients they have nothing to lose by signing them.

The government has made positive comments about the possibility of a change in the law to make pre-nups legally binding but there is no sign of anything concrete just yet. In the meantime, agreements that are particularly in favour of one party are likely to be viewed less favourably and the arrival of children will change the picture altogether.

It's a sad fact of life that divorce rates are still high in the UK, with the average first marriage lasting just six years. However improbable it may seem, life has a funny way of throwing us curve balls. You may have every good intention about making your marriage last a lifetime. But if your spouse cheats you may feel that the marriage has broken down through no fault of your own and is best ended. At this point, you might be glad you made some sort of financial plan. Research from accountants Grant Thornton shows that extra-marital affairs remain the number one reason for divorce in the UK, with adulterous behaviour accounting for 27% of all cases in 2004, down from a total of 29% in the previous year. Other common deal-breakers included family strains, abuse, addictions and workaholism. The survey also found that 13% of marriages in 2004 ended because of mid-life crises. Pre-nuptial agreements continued to increase in popularity with more than 98% of matrimonial lawyers reporting higher or similar demand for these services than in the previous year.

'The idea that half the UK would like a pre-nuptial agreement is not as far-fetched as it may first sound,' says Sandra Davis, partner and head of top London law firm Mishcon de Reya's Family Practice. 'I estimate that at some point in the not too distant future pre-nups will become binding in a similar way to the US and South Africa.'

What's mine is mine

The idea that pre-nups are only relevant for celebrities is fading fast, as is the image of them being protection for rich husbands against gold-digging wives. As more women develop increasingly successful careers, in many modern marriages it is often the wife who has as much, if not more, to lose than the husband.

Even considering a pre-nup leads couples to focus on their finances and that can only be a sensible thing. Making an agreement can provide several benefits including the opportunity to save money and disputes in the case of a divorce and to protect property which is intended to be passed down through a family line. It can also address the interests of any children.

'It seems people are taking the 'for richer or for poorer' wedding vow a little too literally these days,' says Phil Garlick of smile. 'Although we encourage our customers to consider their financial security carefully, I'm surprised at how many people have admitted wanting a pre-nuptial agreement. But I suppose that when you bear in mind that one-in-four fairytale weddings will end in divorce and that Britain holds the rather depressing record for the highest divorce rate in Europe, a pre-nup begins to make sense.'

Get your clause out

And it is not just cash which can be covered. Across the pond, pre-nups have traditionally been crammed with bizarre clauses. These may routinely include division of season tickets to sports games or the theatre but some people address the number of times per week sexual relations are to take place. Spare a thought for the woman on the sharp end of a US prenup which cuts any payout to her if she puts on more than ten pounds above her wedding-day weight.

The Great British Public's list of demands, however, are slightly more down to earth. The 'no cheating' clause is just as popular but other favourites include 'no snoring, breaking wind or leaving the loo seat up' plus equal sharing of housework, limits on shopping sprees, no contact with exes, limited family visits and strict possession of the remote control.

Research by Norwich Union reveals that only 2% of people questioned had a pre-nuptial agreement but more than one in four said they would have been better off had they had one drawn up prior to their wedding. The results also show that getting past the first five years of marriage decreases the chances of divorce. Sticking together for more than 20 years usually means you are set for life.

Break-ups of the rich and famous

Brad and Jen, Bruce and Demi, Tom and Nicole. The sidewalks of Hollywood are littered with broken movie star marriages. Of course, no self-respecting celeb would risk their hard-earned millions on the odds of a Hollywood marriage lasting a lifetime. Pre-nups are commonplace in la-la land. Michael Douglas and Catherine Zeta Jones are rumoured to have agreed on a private settlement after she is said to have asked for million for every year they are married plus a free home. Douglas has past experience with the cost of divorce after a reported million payout to his ex-wife. Scary Spice Melanie Brown is said to have ignored her mother's advice and resolutely refused to sign a pre-nuptial agreement before her marriage to dancer Jimmy Gulzar. He reputedly gained a £1.2million settlement at the end of their 16-month marriage.