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Don't let the crunch ruin your relationship

By  Credit Expert from Experian

 

If the memory of a happy Christmas is only being kept alive by the bills you now have to pay - and the rows you're having with your partner about overspending - then you're not alone.

More than a million British couples have separated because of disagreements over cash, according to research by CreditExpert, the UK's largest online credit monitoring service.

Meanwhile, Relate reports a rise of almost 60 per cent in the number of couples asking for counselling in October and November 2008, compared to the previous year, citing job insecurity, interest rates and the rising costs of running a family as their major problems. For the record, the 12 January is the day when you're statistically most likely to break up.

But financial pressure doesn't have to ruin your relationship. These tips can help you to come through the winter doldrums.

1. What's the damage?

It's easy to get wound up when the bills arrive but you need to know what the damage really is - and that means seeing what you really owe. The easy way to get an overview of the credit you've built up is to check your credit report, which not only details your credit accounts and repayment record but also includes a list of your lenders, to remind you of old accounts you've managed to forget. Take advantage of a free trial of CreditExpert and you can see your Experian credit report for free.

2. Remember you're in this together

If you have any joint credit accounts, such as a mortgage, your credit history is formally linked to the other person. Each of you will find the other's name under Financial associations on your credit report. This means that lenders may check the other person's credit report when you apply to them, because their circumstances could affect your ability to pay. So you both need to work on your credit status, even if you aren't planning to make any further joint applications - or the partner with a spotless record could be penalised because his or her other half hasn't been so meticulous.

3. Don't fret - take action

If you constantly worry about money, your partner could pick up on it and may become anxious or even feel guilty. If you feel fretful, try checking your credit report. It will help to show you whether you're worrying unnecessarily. If your fears are genuine, then you can tackle your problems.

4. Agree a way forward

Be honest about your income and commitments, then draw up a realistic budget. Share out the financial tasks, such as paying bills, and agree some personal indulgences, whether those are new shoes or a drink with the lads. Being too tough on each other will only bring on more rows.

5. Be honest with your lenders

If you think you may not be able to make your repayments on time and in full, talk to your lenders - remember that they include utility companies and mobile phone service providers as well as banks, mortgage providers and card companies. They may be able to reschedule your debts or even give you a temporary payment holiday.

Get professional help

If you're still floundering financially, get professional help. Sources of free advice include Citizens Advice, National Debtline, the Consumer Credit Counselling Service and Payplan. Or try your local council - some run local debt advisory services.

Face up to break-up

If you do separate, and you wish to separate your credit history too, you will need to close all joint accounts. You should also tell the credit reference agencies - Experian is the UK's largest. If your ex gets into money trouble after you've parted, you could be penalised if you don't make your financial separation official. Always check your credit report to make sure the change has gone through.


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